Tuesday, May 7, 2019

A great riddle to myself

Pierini Fitness is enjoying this time of year and this should be his case for the remainder of the year.  He has time to breathe and immerse himself in the pleasantries of daily living, not burdened or toiled by the demands of an overwhelming work schedule. That time has come and gone; thanks be to God.

There's time to be and not do, reflect and not decide, and smell the roses of life at its finest rather than the stench of a rat race behaving like a dozen pit bulls circling endlessly chasing their tails.

While the thrill of riding the giant roller coaster of work can be exhilarating when its commotion is in motion, there comes a time when the sereneness of being still, like a calm lake on a hot summer afternoon mirroring an image of the sun above, seems  more desired of the two.

These reflective “Kodak moments” are wonderful opportunities for Pierini Fitness getting to know himself better.  Blogging about whatever happens to be on my mind, middle-aged man reflections about living and dying, gracefully-aging and trying to live a good and honest life, is another venue of self-discovery.  

I wonder, though, after 64 years of self-discovery, is there anything else more to know about myself?  Or, is my self-discovery never-ending, like climbing a mountain taking one-half step at a time, only to discover that this half-step cadence means I’ll never arrive at my destination?

Is the more I know the less I know myself?  Is this also true for all middle-aged men around the world?  Is it possible, in our lifetimes, we’ll ever know who we are, our authentic and true selves?  

Are we destined to be, at best, a giant masquerade, wrapped in a veneer of external trappings – profession and possessions believed to be our joys and toys – wearing a costume with mask of a fictional character we’ve chosen when going about doing our doings in the world we live?  

Time will tell when the truth is eventually revealed which may not happen until the end of our lives on planet earth.  Until then, maybe we should chant, as St. Augustine wrote in his classic The Confessions of St. Augustine, “Thus I became a great riddle to myself.”

Pax Domini sit semper vobiscum

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