Serious middle-aged men afflictions

Recently, the World Health Organization (WHO) strongly encouraged scientists, national authorities, the media and other stakeholders such as the pharmaceutical industry to follow what it described as “best practices” when giving a name to human diseases.  

Furthermore, to assert its world dominance in the disease name-calling arena, WHO made it clear it would issue its own interim name for a disease and recommend its use so that inappropriate names do not become established.

These new best practices will apply to a new disease that has never been recognized before in humans and where no disease name is yet established in common usage.

Additionally, WHO makes it clear that names should be short and easy to pronounce.  It gives examples such as rabies and malaria.  In cases where a long name has already been given to a disease and subsequently shortened to an acronym, such as ADHS or AIDS for example, the acronym should be evaluated to ensure it complies with the newly-published best practices.

Well who does WHO think it is and doesn’t WHO have anything else better to do?

Recognizing a similar need for best practices for naming newly-discovered middle-aged men behaviors, Pierini Fitness asserts its dominance in naming such behaviors so that inappropriate names and ensuing stigmas do not become established that would only serve to terrorize the self-esteem of middle-aged men. 

Furthermore, new names will be given to existing middle-aged men behaviors to comply with these best practices.

Here are three examples; know that many more will follow.  

Narcissism or 
MILOS Syndrome?

Some middle-aged men are known to have excessive or erotic interest in themselves and/or their physical appearance.  Pierini Fitness hereby decrees that middle-aged men afflicted with this behavior shall not be described as suffering from narcissism or of being a narcissist.  

Telling a middle-aged man he is a narcissist or that he suffers from narcissism is very damaging to his self-esteem.  So this behavior shall now be known as MILOS (Man In Love Of Self) Syndrome.  

Nose picking or
PINT Syndrome?

Other middle-aged men have been known to pick their noses in public.  Pierini Fitness hereby decrees that middle-aged men afflicted with this behavior shall not be described as nose-pickers.  

Catching a middle-aged man picking his nose in public and then calling him a nose-picker is very damaging to his self-esteem.  So this behavior shall now be known as PINT (Picking Itchy Nose Time) Syndrome.

Silent farting in public
or FAME Syndrome?

Finally, it’s well-known that, after a big and delicious meal, middle-aged men like to pass silent gas in the company of others and then smirk a private grin while whistling Dixie with their hands in their pants’ pockets.  Pierini Fitness hereby decrees that middle-aged men afflicted with this behavior shall not be described as farters.  

Telling a middle-aged man that he has farted and then calling him a farter or farthead is very damaging to his self-esteem.  So this behavior shall now be known as FAME (Fuming After Meal Emissions) Syndrome.  

Therefore, a middle-aged man who is in love with himself, picks his nose in public and farts in an elevator shall be identified as suffering from MILOS, PINT and FAME Syndromes. 

Yes syndromes because they cause pain and suffering and, therefore, are serious middle-aged men afflictions.

Pax Domini sit semper vobiscum