"I can't hear you!"

Sooner or later, middle-aged man gracefully-aging small talk will includes discussions about failing eyesight and hearing.  The former has been discussed here a time or two but the latter hasn’t until now.

There comes a time when we middle-aged men have to fess up and confess that there are subtle changes going on with our ability to hear that about us.  There’s good and bad in this aging phenomenon. 

The good is that we may not be able to hear that fatso middle-aged man cutting a decibel-piercing fart in the public square such in line for seconds or thirds at the neighborhood all-you-can-eat buffet.

The bad is we may not be able to hear what someone is telling us in conversation.  Our lack of lip-reading skills may force us to get a little egg on our face and embarrassingly ask someone if they’ll repeat what they just said once, twice and maybe more before we get it.

I see young people in noisy places sometimes and am amazed at their ability to carry on a conversation on their smart phone.  I wouldn’t even bother attempting something like that.

It’s not that I’m deaf or anything like that but truth be told, I must confess, thanks to my wife bringing this to my attention, that my middle-aged man ears may be older than my chronological age and their ability to hear what’s being said is suspect.

So what’s a middle-aged man afflicted with declining hearing ability supposed to do?

Certainly I could go get my hearing tested by an audiologist and see what my truth is.  And if that truth is I have a hearing problem, then I could ask for a prescription for a hearing aid.  These devices seem to be more high-tech and miniature nowadays and I’m sure I could pack a pair inside my ears and the world may not even know.

I’m not sure it’s time for that journey so I’ll go about life as I’m currently doing while trying to be honest about this growing reality which, in time, will probably only get worse.

So maybe I’ll spend some time taking an internet online course on lip reading or just telling that person who seems to be whispering to me to speak louder because “I can’t hear you!”

Pax Domini sit semper vobiscum