Elation constellation

Middle-age men across America, and frankly around the world, have been chicken-cooped up inside in safe shelter in place mode much too long for their primal liking. It’s a matter of time before they throw up their arms in disgust, protest and revolt and begin shouting, “Enough is enough!” 

After all, it’s one month into Spring 2020, the weather continues getting nicer each day and outdoor activity needs aren’t being satisfied by peeking outside from the living room window watching the birds, butterflies and squirrels fly and climb about. 

This shelter in place quarantine isn’t good for middle-age man self-esteem and it's creating a proclivity for random nonsense and relentless restlessness.

Middle-age men unreleased pent-up energy is creating various behaviors and feelings, some which are unfamiliar or unidentifiable.

At times, they might be in a frantic panic.

Or, they might be feeling melancholy, by golly.

And, after watching too many hours of fake news on television, they might be spewing snarky malarkey.

Any which way you look at it, they're envisioning an end to what they’re experiencing. They want to be released into the wild, shelter in place chains unshackled, and free to roam from here to there.

They yearn for a normalcy that creates an aura of middle-age man energy and joy like an elation constellation.

Pax Domini sit semper vobiscum

Severe enthusiasm deficit

Photo in graduate psychology textbook of middle-aged man 

afflicted with a case of Sunday severe enthusiasm deficit.

As I was sitting on my butt yesterday doing absolutely nothing, it dawned on me that I was afflicted with a Stage 4 case of Sunday lethargy. It happens every now and then and maybe more often for middle-age men. We sometimes don’t have the gumption to go here and there, doing this and that like we did in our olden days when younger.

I’m sure some middle-age men are still doing the Sunday full-throttle thing, but I’ll also venture to say that many have discovered the joy of a good Sunday sit.

It seems, though, my Sunday sit was more intense, both in duration and pleasure. I was suffering from delayed-onset muscle soreness (DOMS) from consecutive days of kettlebell training on Friday and Saturday after having not swung my bells in a while. 

I was sore in all the typical places you’d expect to be from a good kettlebell workout – traps, back, arms and legs – but nothing extremely painful to be concerned about; rather, nice sensations that I had worked muscle areas that hadn’t been worked in a while from the other fitness training I’ve been doing of late.

The great plan I had of going on a longer-duration Sunday run wasn't going to happen and this I realized early in the morning. Thoughts of keeping it Sunday simple danced in my mind of doing a relaxing middle-age man trilogy of “eat, shit and sleep” done with a wash, rinse, and repeat cadence throughout the day.  

As the day wore on, it seemed like a little more pep started to surface but nothing of enormity making me want to redeem myself in the physical fitness department. It was destined to be a complete day of rest; after all, my body needed it and who am I do disregard the obvious cues it gives me that my Sunday was destined to be a rest and recovery day.

Still, though, there was an emerging mid-afternoon urge I felt to do something like, perhaps, go for a walk and work out some of my lingering DOMS. 

But it never happened because this emerging urge to do something was met by a more formidable and stronger force of something I experienced that can best be described as severe enthusiasm deficit.

Pax Domini sit semper vobiscum

Blame it on the Coronavirus

Throughout the history of mankind, men and women have found auditory solace in music and lyrics, sung from the heart and soul by professionals and amateurs alike, sharing a feeling, reflection and/or a sentiment about life lived, life living and life wanting to live.

It provides a time out from the burdens and toils of our now life that, at times, can be overwhelming.  Like the Coronavirus Pandemic gripping our nation and the world, and the media’s never-ending bombardment of one doom and gloom bad story after another.

There will one day be light at the end of our Coronavirus tunnel.  We will one day soon find our pot of gold at the end of a rainbow - a normalcy that we yearn to return to - waiting for us.  We’ll all be ready.

Until then, in moments of shelter in place fatigue, when we’re afflicted with a serious case of stir-crazy syndrome and despair, let’s sing some music. How about this one – a parody sung to the classic 1963 song sung by the late Edyie Gorme named Blame it on the Bossa Nova, except let’s call it Blame it on the Coronavirus.

Pax Domini sit semper vobiscum

Don't pick your nose

Almost eleven years ago, Pierini Fitness composed one, among many, of his favorite middle-age man reflections - Find something else to worry about – after observing many of his clients worrying unnecessarily about the economy at the time and its impact on their personal finances.  His takeaway message to clients from these observations was that all was well, and they’d have to find something else to worry about.

Time would prove that I was correct, although true to the statement, history does repeat itself and at this moment, a nation and a world is worried to death about the Chinese Coronavirus.  It’s understandable because fear is a pastime for so many people who have become comfortable worrying about this and that.  We all have fears because we’re human and Pierini Fitness would never say that he doesn’t suffer from occasional fears, it’s just that, perhaps, he does a better job of co-existing with them and being able to continue marching forward in the life he’s living.

God willing, he’ll continue to be able to do this because, like everyone else, there’s a risk of some degree that this virus could afflict him.

But, to all my fellow middle-age men around the world, I have an important press release that hopefully will provide you with some welcoming comfort.

Pierini Fitness has recently conducted cutting-edge research on the impact fear has on the risk of catching or avoiding the Chinese Coronavirus.  His findings are that fear has no impact so go find something else to worry about.

But do exercise caution in going about living your life to the fullest.  Follow the best practices possible regarding personal hygiene, being careful in meetings and travel, handling food carefully and staying home if you’re feeling sick.  Don’t put your fingers in your mouth and don’t pick your nose.

Pax Domini sit semper vobiscum